Are you good at first impressions? Can you tell things about a person’s personality in that first meeting? I’m notoriously bad at it. So bad, that I rarely trust that first impression.
Let me tell you about a recent first impression. I have problems with my heart. I decided to go to a cardiologist who was closer to home and one who could meet me at the closest hospital to my home, if necessary. I don’t know about where you live, but here the hospitals are very clickish. Stone throwing between hospital personnel is common to the disgust of everyone else.
It seemed right to change. My old cardiologist is 35 miles from home and it’s not at all convenient to see him. So, I went to meet the new cardiologist. My first impression – male chauvinist pig. He was curt to everyone. Talked down to me. Seemed to expect me to keep my mouth shut and do what he said. I heard him yell from his office “[office girl] how long does it take to go to the mailbox and bring back come coffee?” It sounded so nasty. I noticed the staff was treading gingerly. No chit chat. No pleasantries with the patients. Just working quietly.
Did I want this man by my bedside in times of crisis? Let’s think about that. If I need him to meet me at the hospital, what do I need? I need the best doctor I can find to help me through a crisis of the heart. Does his personality matter or only his excellent skills? I’ve been thinking about this while I went through an electrocardiogram of my heart and a stress test. Could I work with a man who has no personality, but very good skills?
Yesterday I returned to hear the results of the tests. The doctor had an emergency at the hospital and was not available. In his place I was seen by a young nurse practitioner. She seemed to have almost as many degrees as the doctor did. We were almost done when the doctor arrived.
He was bouncy, bubbly, elated. I was surprised. The rest of the visit went well.
Now I have two times to compare. At the first visit he’d been bad tempered. At the second visit, he was in a good mood. Why? Maybe because yesterday he’d won the battle and he loved the victory of it. Is this a doctor I want by my side in times of crisis? You bet.
You see why I don’t really trust my first impressions.
Marilynne
